Joseph Wants Nancy’s Apples
In 2021, I did a 10-day series of posts leading up to Thanksgiving to share resources, quotes, and stories about how I deconstructed the doctrine of LDS Mormon Polygamy, or as the early Latter-day Saints called it “the Practice.” I used the hashtags #givethanks for each of these posts because then-Prophet Russell M. Nelson had just hyped up members to receive a modern day prophecy which consisted of him suggesting that all members of the Church do some humble-bragging missionary work with that hashtag in the days leading up to Thanksgiving. As far as I know, Church Members are still circulating this hashtag around Thanksgiving as a way to signal their loyalty to the Church when posting about the holiday.
These posts were a bit more passive aggressive than normal for me, since I generally try/tried to be very gentle with Church Members. I know how it feels to be in that tender balance of earnestness + cognitive dissonance while being overloaded with Church chores and family duties. My goal even as I deconstructed, was to be hard on the system but soft with people. However, getting a full face of gushing gratitude about Temples and the General Authorities and Joseph Smith every day when I went to Social Media was pretty grating and ultimately, these 10 posts were an attempt to communicate with the community I come from by using the “in-speak” of the Church while inviting critical thinking, rather than herd-compliance.
The #Givethanks Anti-Polygamy Posts
Day 3
Warning: code words incoming!
Happiness is the object and design of our existence; and will be the end thereof, if we pursue the path that leads to it; and this path is virtue, uprightness, faithfulness, holiness, and keeping all the commandments of God.”
Joseph Smith, Letter to Nancy Rigdon
If you’re LDS, you probably recognize this as a quote that’s been used in a lot of Church talks.
Extra credit, if you knew this quote is from Joseph Smith.
If you know the context of the quote, though, you’ve probably already graduated from Mormonism.
This quote comes from a letter from Joseph directed to Nancy Rigdon after she had refused Joseph’s advances attempting to persuade her into being a plural wife. She was 19 years old.
The full text reads as follows (source: The JS Papers ) I’ve emphasized the portions that are especially 😬
Joseph Smith to Nancy Rigdon:
“Happiness is the object and design of our existence, and will be the end thereof, if we pursue the path that leads to it; and this path is virtue, uprightness, faithfulness, holiness, and keeping all the commandments of God; but we cannot keep all the commandments without first knowing them, and we cannot expect to know all, or more than we now know, unless we comply with or keep those we have already received!
That which is wrong under one circumstance, may be, and often is, right under another. God said, “Thou shalt not kill”; at another time he said, “thou shalt utterly detstroy.’
This is the principle on which the government of heaven is conducted, by revelation adapted to the circumstances in which the children of the Kingdom are placed.
Whatever God requires is right, no matter what it is, although we may not see the reason thereof till long after the events transpire. If we seek first the kingdom of God, all good things will be added So with Solomon; first he asked wisdom, and God gave it him, and with it every desire of his heart; even things which might be considered abominable to all who understand the order of heaven only in part, but which in reality were right because God gave and sanctioned by special revelation.
A parent may whip a child, and justly too, because he stole an apple; whereas, if the child had asked for the apple and the parent had given it, the child would have eaten it with a better appetite; and there would have been no stripes; all the pleasures of the apple would have been secured, and the misery of stealing lost.
This principle will justly apply to all of God’s dealings with his children. Everything that God gives us is lawful and right, and it is proper that we should enjoy his gifts and blessings, whenever and wherever he is disposed to bestow; but if we should seize upon those same blessings and enjoyments without law, without revelation, without commandment, those blessings and enjoyments would prove cursings and vexations in the end, and we should have to lie down in sorrow and wailings of everlasting regret.
But in obedience there is joy and peace unspotted, unalloyed; and as God has designed our happiness, the happiness of all his creatures, he never has, he never will, institue an ordinance, or give a commandment to his people that is not calculated in its nature to promote that happiness which he has designed, and which will not end in the greatest amount of good and glory to those who become the recipients of his law and ordinances.
Blessings offered, but rejected, are no longer blessings, but become like the talent hid in the earth by the wicked and slothful servant; the proffered good returns to the giver; the blessing is bestowed on those who will receive, and occupy; for unto him that hath shall be given, and he shall have abundantly, but unto him that hath not, or will not receive, shall be taken away that which he hath, or might have had.
‘Be wise to day; ‘tis madness to defer!
Next day the fatal precedent may plead;
Thus on till wisdom is pushed out of time, into eternity.’
Our Heavenly Father is more liberal in his views, and boundless in his mercies and blessings, than we are ready to believe or receive, and, at the same time, is more terrible to the workers of iniquity, more awful in the executions of his punishments, and more ready to detect every false way than we are apt to suppose him to be; he will be inquired of by his children; he says, ‘Ask and ye shall receive, seek and ye shall find; but, if ye will take that which is not your own, or which I have not given you, you shall be rewarded according to your deeds; but no good thing will I withold from them who walk uprightly before me, and do my will in all things; who will listen to my voice, and to the voice of my servant whom I have sent; for I delight in those who seek diligently to know my precepts, and abide by the laws of my Kingdom; for all things shall be made known unto them in mine own due time, and in the end they shall have joy.’”
Admittedly, this is kind of dense, so here’s a TLDR:
“Dear Nancy,
I speak for God and God is always right, so even though what I’m saying seems wrong, it’s actually right and it’s actually required because I, I mean God, says so.
See, you’re like an apple, and I want you, so I asked God if I could have you and he said yes. So, you should be okay with that too, in fact, you’re commanded to be okay with it. I’m sure if it’s really upsetting that god will make it up to you, maybe after you die. But you have to keep submitting to doing everything I say.
With great retention,
General Joseph.”
Well, Nancy showed the letter to her father.
The subsequent incident is described in “Mormon Enigma”:
Nancy Rigdon showed the letter to her father. Rigdon immediately sent for Joseph who reportedly denied everything until Sidney thrust the letter in his face. George W. Robinson, Nancy’s brother-in-law, claimed he witness the encounter and said Joseph admitted that he had spoken with Nancy but that he had only been testing her virtue.”
Following this, there was tension between Sidney and Joseph (obviously). Sidney moved away from Nauvoo, taking his family with him. He later wrote a letter saying he believed Joseph, but the letter is worded in such a way that leaves much ambiguity. The rift between them remained and then, Jospeh died in that gunfight. Sidney came back to Nauvoo briefly to vie for succession as the supreme Mormon leader, but ultimately lost because he didn’t favor polygamy and there were too many key leaders already inducted into the (still secret) practice to choose a man who might expose them all to those darned human rights activists known as the State Authorities.
At least, Nancy got away. She moved to Pittsburgh and married a man named Robert Ellis in 1846 and lived out her life with him. <3
Today, I #givethanks for Nancy Rigdon–a girl with guts; a girl who made it out of the labyrinth of pseudo-scriptural manipulation in which her Prophet tried to snare her; a girl who was so trustworthy that even though she was only 19 years old and living in a very sexist society, her father believed her over his male authority figure.
You go, girl.
More resources for learning about this fascinating exchange listed in the comments. 👇
Watching:
Reading
More detailed treatment of this subject by LDS Discussions
Mormon Discussion Podcast: Number 342 Nancy Rigodn and the Happiness Letter
Discover more from Laura Randle
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